You know, that Jesse dude over at, who, besides being irrationally good-looking, seems to enjoy answering e-mails about Karate issues from readers. Perhaps he could help?Īnd he even asks his facebook fans for help.Ģ. The dojo advertises as “Non-Contact Karate”.ģ. You wear a thousand badges/patches on your gi.Ĥ. You are awarded black belt in 1-2 years.ĥ. Advancement to the next rank is an expense (and a hefty one at that), instead of an honorful achievement.Ħ. Prospective students are required to become a member/subscribe before even trying a lesson.ħ. Your sensei is a “grandmaster” with 7th dan or above, yet is 30 years or younger.Ĩ. There is a “special course” that’ll get you black belt in 6 months or less.ĩ. (And yes, that course is super expensive.)ġ0. Your sensei won’t spar/fight with you because he “doesn’t want to hurt you”.ġ1. Individual development and personal expression is virtually non-existant. Instead, a strong conformist mentality is encouraged, since this inflexible mindset is what makes it easy for a sensei to rule the dojo.ġ2. You are never taught bunkai (applications) to moves.ġ3. If you are taught bunkai, they never work – except when your sensei does them.ġ4. Instructors wear special ‘instructor belts’ rather than regular belts reflecting their true ranking.ġ5. There are many claims of being an “award winning dojo”, with little or no solid evidence to back this up.ġ6. Your sensei studied marketing longer than Karate.ġ7. Instructors are required to have the dojo’s decals on their car.ġ9. There is a sign that says “Guaranteed Black Belt”.Ģ0. There are 11th dan, 12th dan, 13th dan or even higher grades.Ģ3. Your style was created by your sensei, yet it’s still “traditional” – and it has several “special advantages” over all other styles. Oh, and most likely, the name of the style is absurdly long.Ģ5. You have stripes on your belt that signify how much you have paid (rather than what rank you have)Ģ8. The dojo sign has the words ‘traditional’, ‘commando’, ‘classical’, ‘effective’, ‘100%’, ‘original’, ‘Okinawan’, ‘dragon’, ‘Japanese’, ‘secret’ and ‘elite’ in the same sentence.Ģ9. Between belt grades you get colored tabs on your belt to denote ‘half’ or ‘quarter’ ranks.ģ1. Wearing/buying the dojo merchandize is mandatory.ģ2. So cluttered that every time you take a step towards any direction in a kata, you’re actually stepping on a trophy.ģ3. Speaking of kata there are waaaay too many of them.ģ4. Your grandmaster is 14-times World Champion (WKITSKTFKTAF)ģ5. Cheesy sales tactics are used to effectively bind up loyal customers (a.k.a. If you use weapons, they glow in the dark and weigh a maximum of 3 oz.Ĥ0. The instructor uses students as punching bags.Ĥ1. ![]() Movements don’t have names – they have numbers.Ĥ2. The dojo’s web address is printed on the back of your uniform.Ĥ3. The dojo’s phone number is printed on the back of your uniform.Ĥ4. The instructor refuses to teach you certain techniques, because they are “too deadly”Ĥ5. (When in fact, the instructors is just holding you back for fear that you’ll get better than him.)Ĥ6. Red gi for the grandmaster, black gi for instructors and white gi for regular students.Ĥ8.
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